SoINeedAName

Friday Fun: “Free Rude Questions” – NSFW … But FUNNY!

 Posted by at 4:59 pm  Politics
May 012020
 

Over at Daily Kos, Kossack Noah Veil posted a Diary this week dispensing “FREE RUDE QUESTIONS” to share regarding actual “NASTY” queries that Trump should really be asked. To help in that endeavor, I’m “borrowing” a few from a very, VERY long list that I encourage you to enjoy at the link.

They tend to not follow a linear path, and I’ve scattered a few new suggestions along the way, but it deservedly earned its 474 Recommendations! And I can just envision John Cleese of Monty Python fame asking them.

NSFW Due to Language

They employ a GREAT deal of … ahhh … hmmm … “salty” language that I have elected to leave as is. (Not only would they lose their punch, but otherwise I’d be spending hours cleaning them up). So considered yourself WARNED!

When were the streets of Washington D.C. emptier: During your Pandemic, or during your inauguration?

Since you claim testing isn’t necessary, why does everyone who comes near you get a test?

What kind of fucking asshole lies to people about whether they can get tested for a potentially fatal virus?

Can you define corruption and explain how many ways it applies to you?

What do you have to say to the vast majority of Americans who think you are the biggest fucking idiot to ever hold political office?

Have you ever told the truth about anything? Prove it.

Hold up a stopwatch and say …

REPORTER: “Starting now, how long can you go without telling a lie?”

Click.

TRUMP: ”I don’t tell lies….”

Click.

Well, that was quick!

This cat turd in my pocket has a higher IQ than you. Would you like to ask it a question?

Why aren’t there any graduates from Trump University in your cabinet?

If you were created in God’s image, how come we can see you?

Can you list the Ten Commandments, and tell us how many of them there are?

Nobody gives a shit what your TV ratings are. Why do you keep mentioning it?

Do you know what the word “sociopath” means, and how is it possible it does NOT apply to you, you fucking shithead?

Do you have any Neanderthal DNA?

The worst medical crisis in over a century that the US has ever faced is happening at the same time as the worst president the US has ever had is in the Oval Office.  Do you think this is a coincidence?

How disappointed are you that NO student will EVER plagiarize a SINGLE word of your incoherent rambling speeches?

Have you ever in your entire life used a dictionary?

That MIT uncle of yours who is alledgedly so smart? Tell us one single, solitary actual thing you learned from him….

That wasn’t an actual thing….

Neither was that…

Do you actually NOT know what the word “actual” means?

We are now a bigger shithole country than all the countries you called shitholes. Don’t you think they deserve an apology?

Could you please repeat your oath of office? You’ve violated it so many times that America thinks you need a refresher.

Everybody on earth recognizes that you don’t have a shred of human decency. As the worst human being who has ever lived, this is your last chance. Can you say one single empathetic thing?

By what metric are you NOT the most incompetent leader on earth … EVAH?

What’s it like being impeached?

How far have you gotten on drafting your concession speech?

When you leave office, you will obviously be arrested for your endless crimes against humanity. Do you have any preference for what prison you will spend the rest of your life?

https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2020/4/29/1941430/-FREE-RUDE-QUESTIONS-FOR-REPORTERS-He-already-thinks-you-re-rude-Show-him-what-the-word-really-means

My “Take Home” Conclusion:

 

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Friday Fun: Where to Begin …

 Posted by at 2:34 pm  Politics
Apr 242020
 

(Hmmm – Let me see if I remember how to do this …)

To commence, I’d like to start off on the right foot with a beautiful photo courtesy of Webshots …

KIDDING

In the interim I’ve been able to restock my larder with topics.  But I want to begin with a timely one, courtesy of Dr. Donald Trump.  And to lay the groundwork, here are his actual words from yesterday’s proxy rally Coronavirus briefing, directly from the White House Transcript:

THE PRESIDENT: So, supposing we hit the body with a tremendous — whether it’s ultraviolet or just very powerful light — and I think you said that that hasn’t been checked, but you’re going to test it. And then I said, supposing you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or in some other way, and I think you said you’re going to test that too. It sounds interesting.

And then I see the disinfectant, where it knocks it out in a minute. One minute. And is there a way we can do something like that, by injection inside or almost a cleaning. Because you see it gets in the lungs and it does a tremendous number on the lungs. So it would be interesting to check that. So, that, you’re going to have to use medical doctors with. But it sounds — it sounds interesting to me.

White House Transcript

There you have it – Dr. Trump is now switching from Hydroxychloroquine to powerful ultraviolet light and/or injection of disinfectants.  So we can all imagine how Hydroxychloroquine is feeling right about now …

There is some concern about bringing the UV “light inside the body” as Trump suggests. Here is one of its more disturbing side effects:

But I want to focus more on his suggestion of directly injecting a disinfectant into the body. I was confused about where this idea came from – until someone provided a snapshot of Trump’s old pharmacy:

The good news is that there are options beside IV administration.

For us pediatricians, that is great news. We all know how scary needles are to most children – so the good news is that Clorox now comes in a chewable tablet.

And for those adults who also don’t like needles, but are not fond of taking kids’ medicine – you can use an inhaler. But to date, only Lysol has developed this delivery mode:

So it appears there are lots of modalities available for administration of disinfectants.

Well, obviously all this goes to prove that we have an EFFING IDIOT in the Oval Office.

As a physician, I truly hope that these “Thought Bubbles” for Dr. Birx, based on her reaction at yesterday’s briefing, are accurate

 

 

 

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Saturday Smiles: COVID-19 Potpourri

 Posted by at 8:56 am  Politics
Apr 042020
 

To begin, I want to share an important and helpful PSA video of how to put away your groceries to avoid contamination. It’s by a family physician, and although long, it’s well done.

Having done my good deed for the day, let’s enjoy some amusing aspects of the impact of Coronavirus – as it’s always good to see the humor in things.

Who knew that Shakespeare would have a take on this pandemic:

And we wouldn’t want the visual fine arts to feel left out, so here’s Albrecht Dürer’s famous “Praying Hands” sketch– but with a timely update.

But there’s an obvious downside to overdoing it. My aunt sent me this picture of her hands after washing them 73 times yesterday:

I went to Costco today (wearing my red “Cowboy” bandana for a face-covering – and over half of the people were wearing a face-covering of some type), and it looks like we’re seeing at least some relief from the TP shortage. But one never knows – it could rear its ugly head again with scenes like these:

In the Meat section of your grocery store:

A grocery store in Denmark or Finland (I forgot which) developed a clever way to stop the hoarding of hand sanitizer:

Now that folks are stuck at home, tempers can become short – even involving our beloved Critters

But for some, it’s given them time to develop a real talent for creativity.  (I like the second one better):

If you’ve decided you’d rather test your creativity in the kitchen with some new gourmet recipes, you just might want to start following Justine on her Twitter account. While she’s no Julia Child, she does have a flair for the innovative:

I’d be remiss if I didn’t take a parting shot at the A$$hole in the Oval Office whose gross incompetence has literally cost lives.

As you probably know, the CDC is now recommending that everyone wear a facemask of some type when they go out.  They asked *Rump if he would agree to appear in a PSA photo promoting the wearing of facemasks.

As you know, if you say “photo” and “promote” in the same sentence, Donnie will jump at the chance.

Unfortunately, the CDC forgot to factor in that *Rump is dumber than a bag of rocks:

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Friday Fun: War Against the Zombies!

 Posted by at 3:24 pm  Politics
Mar 272020
 

We truly are at War … against two Zombies.

One is an ugly, almost invisible microscopic Zombie that is currently wreaking havoc not only in the United States, but around the world – and about which we’ve heard a great deal:

The other is also an ugly, but way too visible fat Zombie that is also wreaking havoc not only in the United States, but around the world – and from whom we’ve heard WAY TOO MUCH:

I’m bringing this up because there’s an excellent overview article in WaPo about how viruses function that’s aimed at laymen.  And it’s FREE to be read and shared as part of WaPo’s effort (like The New York Times and The Atlantic magazine, and I’m sure other publications) to help educate the public about Coronavirus disease or COVID-19 (which is caused by Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome Coronavirus 2, or SARS-CoV-2).

https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2020/03/23/coronavirus-isnt-alive-thats-why-its-so-hard-kill/

Viruses are a true conundrum for scientists, many of whom actually refer to them as “Zombies” – because they really do NOT fit the criteria of a living thing.

Specifically, viruses are problematic for biologists because they don’t have cells, and therefore do not belong to the three main groups of life that all other organisms do: Bacteria, Archaea (a different form of microbe) and Eukaryota (plants, animals, fungi, etc. – organisms whose cells have a nucleus enclosed in a membrane).

This diagram might be too technical, but it’s an overview of how a virus hijack’s a cellular host’s machinery:

Viruses are basically just rogue genetic material (either DNA or RNA) housed in a protein shell called a capsid. They are unable to reproduce on their own, and so they use their protein shell to invade the host cells in order to insert their DNA or RNA into the host’s cells, and commandeer the host’s “machinery” to produce more of their own DNA or RNA viruses.

As noted in the WaPo article:

There is a certain evil genius to how this coronavirus pathogen works: It finds easy purchase in humans without them knowing. Before its first host even develops symptoms, it is already spreading its replicas everywhere, moving onto its next victim. It is powerfully deadly in some but mild enough in others to escape containment. And for now, we have no way of stopping it.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2020/03/23/coronavirus-isnt-alive-thats-why-its-so-hard-kill/

So paraphrasing from a Comment, we can see a striking similarity between the Coronavirus Zombie as detailed above, and the Trump Zombie detailed below:

There is a certain evil genius to how this Trumpublican pathogen works: It finds easy purchase in humans who know nothing. Before its first host even develops symptoms, it is already spreading its lies and hatred everywhere through Fox News, Rush Limbaugh, etc. – before moving onto its next victim. It is powerfully deadly in some “hosts” causing them to run over protesters with their cars, but mild enough in others to make them merely vote for the GOP. And, for now, we have no way of stopping it.

But come November 3rd we’ll be able to decapitate (it’s the only way to kill one) that Trump Zombie  with our votes – and DESTROY IT!

(Have I hinted enough that I would truly encourage you to read the WaPo article to gain an overview to how a virus functions?)

https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2020/03/23/coronavirus-isnt-alive-thats-why-its-so-hard-kill/

BUT I also want to share some absolutely wonderful ads that are being produced from a variety of sources to attack *Rump – with many using his own words as a petard on which to hoist him.

I hope you’ll feel free to share them with like-minded friends, and those fence-sitters who are amenable to common sense.

This one is from Mike Bloomberg:

 

Documenting how *Rump Failed to Act

 

This is the Priorities USA one (again, using his OWN WORDS) that *Rump’s lawyers have sent a “Cease & Desist” letter to try stop it from airing.

NOT. GOING. TO. HAPPEN!

In fact George Conway (Kellyanne’s husband) is leading the charge in getting into as wide circulation as possible:

 

We know that all presidents at some point will face a true crisis – *Rump FAILED!

A timeline calendar of Trump trying to minimize the Pandemic

This is Biden’s most recent excellent ad put out just a couple of days ago:

Enough of this Doom & Gloom. Let’s close with a smile!

Since people are hunkered down, it’s amazing how inventive they’ve been in entertaining themselves. One theme I’ve seen repeated several times involves folks doing their own DJing. (Is that even a word?)

PSA Heads Up: If you have a cat, be careful what you employ in your bag of tricks:

 

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Saturday Smiles: Lemonade Out of Lemons (COVID-19 Version)

 Posted by at 9:26 am  Politics
Mar 212020
 

During Trump’s self-proclaimed “Democratic HOAX” that has morphed into an actual PANDEMIC, the world needs a leader who can be taken BOTH literally AND seriously. Sadly, Trump fails on both counts.

We’ll try to find some enjoyment – hopefully at Trump’s expense. But let’s first begin with some FACTS & TRUTHS – both of which are clearly anathema to Donnie:

Now let’s enjoy some humorous takes on Trump’s gross mismanagement of COVID-19 beginning with a microscopic view of the virus that explains a lot:

One does have to wonder why Trump put Pence in charge of dealing with the Coronavirus (other than to ensure that they’d BOTH go down together). But apparently in his own unique way, Pence is on top of it:

It looks like Trump and Pence are finally taking the Pandemic seriously:

Here are a couple of Tweets that provide a PSA about the virus:

 

And this would be Mitt Romney’s favorite PSA:

 

Taking hoarding to a whole new level!  Maybe we can do this poor soul a favor and provide a few recipes using boxes and boxes of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes and dozens of bottles of 1000 Island Dressing.

If you’re wondering where Trumpkins are getting their medical care …

And if you’re looking for that unique gift to commemorate the Pandemic:

Ones that I particularly got a kick out of:

And to close, my favorite: There are two types of Costco shoppers with different approaches in preparing to hunker down:

 

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Friday: Empty Venues Worldwide

 Posted by at 9:24 am  Politics
Mar 132020
 

Since this is (hopefully) a once-in-a-lifetime pandemic crisis, I felt it would be fitting to memorialize in pictures the impact of Coronavirus (COVID-19) on daily life.

(I know it will be large – but we should feel the impact of it.)

JFK Airport:

Dodgers Spring Baseball Game:

Madison Square Garden Last Night (NBA Season Now Canceled):

Soccer Game in Europe:

Louvre, Paris:

String Quartet Concert, Venice:

Duomo Cathedral Piazza, Milan:

Pigeons gather on Piazza del Duomo by Milan’s cathedral on March 10, 2020 in Milan. – Italy imposed unprecedented national restrictions on its 60 million people on March 10, 2020 to control the deadly coronavirus, as China signalled major progress in its own battle against the global epidemic. (Photo by Miguel MEDINA / AFP) (Photo by MIGUEL MEDINA/AFP via Getty Images)

Galleria Shopping Center, Milan:

TOPSHOT – A general view shows a woman walk across the deserted Vittorio Emanuele II galleria shopping mall on March 10, 2020 in Milan. – Italy imposed unprecedented national restrictions on its 60 million people on March 10, 2020 to control the deadly coronavirus, as China signalled major progress in its own battle against the global epidemic. (Photo by Miguel MEDINA / AFP) (Photo by MIGUEL MEDINA/AFP via Getty Images)

Paper Products Section, Costco:

A customer walks past mostly empty shelves that normally hold toilet paper and paper towels at a Costco store in Teterboro, N.J., Monday, March 2, 2020. (AP Photo/Seth Wenig)

Ginza Shopping District, Tokyo:

TOKYO, JAPAN – FEBRUARY 26 2020 Virus frightens visitors at Japan’s shopping district of Ginza. Image of empty street in the heart of the luxury hub of the capital.- PHOTOGRAPH BY Massimo Rumi / Barcroft Studios / Future Publishing (Photo credit should read Massimo Rumi/Barcroft Media via Getty Images)

Super-Highway, Hong Kong:

St. Peter’s Square, Rome:

VATICAN CITY, VATICAN – MARCH 8: A view of empty chairs at St Peter’s Square before the live-broadcasting of Pope Francis’ Sunday Angelus prayer during the Coronavirus emergency, on March 8, 2020 in Vatican City, Vatican. Italian Prime Minister Giuseppe Conte announced the closure of the Italian region of Lombardy in an attempt to stop the ongoing coronavirus epidemic in the Italian country. The number of confirmed cases of the Coronavirus COVID-19 disease in Italy has jumped up to at least 5,883, while the death toll has surpassed 230. (Photo by Antonio Masiello/Getty Images)

Church Pews:

Mecca:

TOPSHOT – An aerial view shows an empty white-tiled area surrounding the Kaaba in Mecca’s Grand Mosque, on March 6, 2020. – An eerie emptiness enveloped the sacred Kaaba in Mecca’s Grand Mosque, Islam’s holiest site, where attendance at Friday prayers was hit by measures to protect against the deadly new coronavirus. (Photo by Bandar ALDANDANI / AFP) (Photo by BANDAR ALDANDANI/AFP via Getty Images)

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Friday Fun: Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

 Posted by at 2:13 pm  Politics
Mar 062020
 

You probably recall that Monty Python admonished us to “Always Look on the Bright Side” …

Of course, there is absolutely NO bright side to the suffering, pain and loss the *Rump administration has inflicted on Americans with their devastating mishandling, mismanagement and malfeasance of the Coronavirus.

No doubt this stems from Trump’s cutting $15 BILLION from National Healthcare spending that had been approved by Congress back in 2018. Exacerbated by his firing of the entire US Pandemic Response Team.

But some folks have managed to provide a few smiles and chuckles courtesy of the Keystone Kops incompetence in the Oval Office.

So let’s see if we can look on the bright side …

THIS IS THE BEST (BUT VERY WEIRD) IDEA MIKE HUCKABEE HAS EVER HAD

And I think *Rump is capable of that, if this picture is any indication:

If you needed any further proof that *Rump has absolutely NO idea what he’s talking about – here’s yet another example he doesn’t have a clue:

Well, to be perfectly honest – that’s actually a translation of Trump’s real words, courtesy of a linguist fluent in Argle-Bargle (scroll down):

I believe we should give God the last Tweet – and trust He’s not teasing us with his hopeful prescient prediction:

As for me:

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Friday Fun: And the Oscar for Best Makeup Artist Goes To …? Envelope, Please!

 Posted by at 12:46 pm  Politics
Feb 142020
 

Poor Donnie – he just can NOT compete with the Obamas. Barack and Michelle’s production company, Higher Ground, won its first Academy Award for Best Documentary this past week with “American Factory”.

And we can be sure that *Rump will not even be nominated for Best Makeup Artist anytime soon … or probably forever! And here’s the proof:

Of course, the Innertubes were not going to let this low-hanging fruit go by without picking it clean.

Some Trumpkins think that the late Bob Ross of PBS paint-instructor fame got a little heavy-handed with the orange on a portrait of Donnie …

But before we get too deep into it, let’s establish that this is NOT Photoshopped – as pics taken at the same time by other photographers prove:

(Although the original Tweeter, White House Photos, does explain s/he used Apple’s smartphone photo app to adjust the color.)

And besides, this is not the first time an obvious fake tan line has been documented. Here’s photo of *Rump at his 2019 Christmas party:

 

So let’s enjoy some of the fruits of the Intertubes’ labor.

In an apparent attempt to try to improve the situation, the original poster simply converted the photo to black-and-white – but I doubt that it was an improvement:

In fact, it reminded me of the movie “Cast Away” when Tom Hanks created his “friend” from that Wilson volleyball that washed ashore – and appropriately named it “Wilson”.

One kind soul tried to explain that *Rump wasn’t finished with his foundation makeup yet:

Other, more reality-based souls, were not so charitable in their assessments:

Then again, maybe *Rump just stood too close to a fence hole

We’ve all seen that color-coded card cartoon letting the police know if a person should be charged with a crime or let go because they’re white. But it’s now been updated to accommodate Donnie:

And of course you knew someone was going to compare him to the Oompa Loompas:

A lot of people are saying that Donnie just fell for that old “Banana-in-the-Tailpipe” gag …

But my favorite was the exploding cigar one with Bugs Bunny:

Susan Collins will be glad to hear that there is one lesson I learned from all this: He’s actually looks much better WITH the spray tan! Someone did Photoshop the picture by simply removed the orange coloring, and then you end up getting this:

And if you also take away that architectural hairdo, you get this:

So which do you think is better?  Spray tan, or NO spray tan?

[EDITOR’S NOTE:  I’m going to take off the next two Fridays.  The week after next I have out-of-town guests coming in and staying for extended visit, and I need to do some serious cleaning so the house doesn’t look like the after-effects of a debauched fraternity party.  Unfortunately my OCD does not extend to cleaning.]

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