SoINeedAName

Sep 252020
 

Often, before Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg even speaks a word from the bench, you might well have a good idea of what she’s thinking – just from the jabot she selected to wear.

Her collars serve both as a semiology and semaphore for those who are able to interpret them.  So I thought it’d be interesting and fun to familiarize ourselves with some of her favorites.

When Justice Ginsburg was first confirmed to the Supreme Court, she noted that all the robes she found were designed for men:

“You know, the standard robe is made for a man because it has a place for the shirt to show, and the tie,” Ginsburg told the Washington Post in 2009.  “So Sandra Day O’Connor and I thought it would be appropriate if we included as part of our robe something typical of a woman.  So I have many, many collars.”

 

THE ORIGINAL

This is the jabot she wore for her first official Court portrait.  As is plain to see, it was devoid of any frills, and is very similar to the traditional jabots worn by French justices.

 

HER FAVORITE

The simple white crocheted collar is what she wore to Pres. Obama’s first address to a joint session of the US Congress on December 31, 2005.  It’s the one she tends to show first when displaying her collection of collars and announces it is her favorite.  She wore it to Pres. Obama’s State of the Union in 2012 (an election year), and her 20th anniversary on the bench in 2013.

It was purchased in Cape Town, South Africa – a fact she’s always sure to share – although I was unable to learn the significance of its provenance.

 

MAJORITY OPINION

When she is announcing a majority opinion for the Court, this is the collar she always wears.  The beige and egg-yolk yellow crocheted jabot is quite elaborate, featuring pink edges and gold appliqués, all suspended from a gold chain.

She’s quick to add that it was a gift from her law clerks.  (Kind of like the “Best Boss” coffee mug we might give – only a tad classier.)

 

DISSENT

To express her disapproval (unfortunately too often – but her dissents are eloquent and legendary, and will surely be quoted frequently in future cases) she would wear a bold, black, spiky bib-style necklace decorated with rhinestones from the Banana Republic.  It came from the VIP gift bag at Glamour magazine’s “Women of the Year” gala the year she was an honoree.

It was no coincidence that she also wore it the day after the 2016 election, even though the court had no rulings to issue that day.  It was such a popular design that it’s now available in jewelry, magnets and even paste-on tattoos.

When asked why she chose this one for Dissent, RBG simply said: “It looks fitting for dissent.”

 

FEMINIST FAVORITE

To convey her sentiments of strong equal rights and feminist support, she will wear the Pegasus Necklace from Stella & Dot (never heard of it, but apparently a fairly well-known jewelry maker).  It was a gift from a fellow lawyer who served with her at ACLU.

The gift-giver, Susan Hyman said, “It reminds me of something a warrior princess like Wonder Woman would wear as armor into battle. It projects strength, confidence, and fearlessness.”

Again, no coincidence that she chose it to wear to the Court’s first official portrait with Brett Kavanaugh on November 30, 2018.

And not surprisingly, RBG sent Ms. Hyman a hand-written “Thank You” note.

 

STIFFELIO OPERA COLLAR

This crisp white jabot edged in black has a very interesting background history.  It was purchased at the New York Metropolitan Opera gift shop, and is a replica of the collar worn by Plácido Domingo in Verdi’s opera Stiffelio.

The history made more interesting when Domingo surprised Ginsburg with a serenade when she received an honorary law degree from Harvard. “It was glorious,” she said.

 

LACE – IN HER PORTRAIT

This simple, elegant jabot is what she chose to wear in a portrait she commissioned by Simmie Knox in 2000.

 

MOVIE POSTER

The movie poster for her 2018 “RBG” documentary simply had a collar and her initials – it was all that was needed.

It became such a popular film that theaters started putting up RBG cardboard cutout figures in their lobbies so you could take selfies of yourself as RBG.

There’s a fun, short (2 minutes) interview with Katie Couric chatting about her collars that’s quite interesting.  It contains a clip of her being serenaded by Domingo.  But I couldn’t find anything embeddable (and the CC doesn’t always work).

https://news.yahoo.com/video/justice-ginsburg-exhibits-her-famous-194517521.html

And this brief video (< 1 minute) is fun.  It had a collar from the University of Hawaii made of French lace, and all the beads came from sand on their beaches.

https://www.cnn.com/style/article/ruth-bader-ginsburg-collars/index.html

There are several sites that have quite a few additional photos of RBG and her collars – but none offer any background history (which I obviously enjoy).

https://www.reuters.com/news/picture/collector-of-collars-a-look-back-at-ruth-idUSRTX7WY77

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/ruth-bader-ginsburg-collars_n_58c9812fe4b0cb7d28ce4cf3

As we are now saying farewell to our beloved RBG, I hope we all will continue the good fight she worked so hard for.  So …

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Sep 182020
 

Alav/Aleha Hashalom (“Peace Be Upon Him/Her”)

FILE– Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg in her chambers in Washington, Aug. 23, 2013. Ginsburg on July 14, 2016, apologized for her recent remarks about the candidacy of Donald Trump, saying “On reflection, my recent remarks in response to press inquiries were ill-advised, and I regret making them.” (Hilary Swift/The New York Times)

KADDISH

Exalted and hallowed be God’s great name
in the world which God created, according to plan.
May God’s majesty be revealed in the days of our lifetime
and the life of all Israel — speedily, imminently,
To which we say: Amen.

Blessed be God’s great name to all eternity.

Blessed, praised, honored, exalted,
extolled, glorified, adored, and lauded
be the name of the Holy Blessed One,
beyond all earthly words and songs of blessing, praise, and comfort.
To which we say: Amen.

May there be abundant peace from heaven, and life, for us and all Israel.
To which we say: Amen.

May the One who creates harmony on high, bring peace to us and to all Israel.
To which we say: Amen.

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Sep 182020
 

We Have GOT to Review Those Infantry Applications Closer …

Making Under the Bed an Even BETTER Hiding Place

Target … ACQUIRED!

NO!  I Do NOT Want to Go to the Orthodontist Today!

When the Dog Swipes a Single Bite of the Cat’s Food, You’re Going to Hear About It …

Arrival Time at the Vets

I Have NO Doubt That This Has Happened to Every Pootie Owner After Spending Some Big Bucks on A Special Toy …

They May Not Be Opposable, But Still …

Who Knew There Were Luxurious Cat Spas …

For A Pootie This Cute, I’d Fall for It

It’s Always A Treat When the Bearded Lady from the Circus Visits …

And for My Next Magic Trick, I’ll Reattach the Head …

No, Fluffy – I Do NOT Think The Birds Are Going to Fall For That …

I See Years of Therapy Ahead for An Identity Crisis THIS Profound …

And Finally, to All Who Have Ever Had a Pootie in Our Lives, This Is A Wise Warning for All Us

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Sep 112020
 

Early this evening I came across some low-hanging fruit for a post, so I decided to transform into a “Friday Fun” post.

For those of you who didn’t watch last night’s opening NFL game pitting my Super Bowl KC Chiefs Champs against the Houston Texans, you most likely missed that Chief’s Head Coach Andy Reid fogged up Face Shield was the most talked about aspect of the game.

It was like a Carl Sandburg tribute:

The fog comes
on little cat feet.
It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.

Naturally, the Twitterverse decided to create a Meme of that …

So, here was the problem:

Here’s a Reid’s-Eye-View of the game:

And there was plenty of praise for Reid’s coaching acumen:

Still, it did significantly interfere with communication between Coach Reid and MVP QB Patrick Mahomes:

Making the best of a bad situation, Coach Reid learned he does NOT need a whiteboard to sketch out new plays:

Here’s a demo of how Chiefs communicated the good news after scoring a touchdown:

 

And now there’s a Go-Fund-Me page to get Coach Reid a new, updated Face Shield:

 

My question was …

Why was Coach Reid wearing a Tupperware bowl all evening?

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Sep 102020
 

Yesterday I tripped over the cat and took a tumble ending w/ a face plant.

My right knee was quite painful getting up, but I cleaned up my facial abrasions first.  Then my sweatpants rubbing against my right knee became so painful I took a look.  My R knee was HUGE.  So I immediately began RICE treatment (Rest, Ice, Compression & Elevations).

I had my scheduled PT appointment this morning, so I had Rashad take a look.  He’s concerned that there might be a Posterior Cruciate Ligament (PCL) injury, and asked me to contact my PCP.

I took pictures of my knee and abrasions, and sent them along w/ a detailed history of the injury to my PCP via the Portal.  (I LOVE having portals!)

Haven’t heard back from her, but needing to keep my leg elevated has really cramped any computer work.  So I’ll be skipping this week.

If I come across a brief/short humorous piece, I’ll share it.  But I’m going to be scarce for a few days.

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Sep 042020
 

As Trump continues to unravel at breakneck speed, he’s starting to get comfortable with his true inner-self and transitioning into the real Nazi we all know he is …

The Soup Nazi, that is.

It’s going to be a Sisyphean task to try and rank all of Trump’s Idiotic Statements, but the one just a couple of days ago has got to at least rank in the Top 100:

“And you have people coming over with bags of soup — big bags of soup.  And they lay it on the ground, and the anarchists take it and they start throwing it at our cops, at our police.  And if it hits you, that’s worse than a brick because that’s got force.  It’s the perfect size.  It’s, like, made perfect.  And when they get caught, they say, ‘No, this is just soup for my family.  And the media says, ‘This is just soup.’”

If you don’t believe me that anyone could say something that stupid, here’s the official White House transcript:

(SIDEBAR:  You know what happens after Trump eats a huge bowl of alphabet soup?

(He has a vowel movement.)

Once again, the Twitterverse stepped up and did what it does best – make a total mockery of Trump’s stupidity.

Truth be told, it shocked me to learn that Sec. of Commerce Wilbur Ross is an Anarchist …

But who knew those cute Campbell’s kids were Antifa?

But you don’t have to feel left out of the protests – you, too, can stock an arsenal of soups, just like the rest of the Antifa movement.

Why, here’s an example of budding Anarchist “souper” soldier:

But when you’re coming home from the grocery store with your larder – please drive carefully!

And be aware: Now that Trump has spilled the beans (no pun intended), QAnon, Boogaloo Bois and other right-wingers have been alerted – and are spreading the word about our secret weapons:

A word to those on a budget when stocking up: The powers that be at Antifa are cutting back on our supply allowances:

(I have to admit that I, myself, stopped carrying mace a couple years back.  I now pack a can of Progresso Cream of Mushroom.  It delivers a doozy of a wallop!)

You know what the NRA always says: “The only way to stop a bad guy with a can of soup is a good guy with a can of soup.”

(Being a strong gun control proponent, I have to admit I stewed a long time about posting that one.)

If you’re worried about Trump setting Federal forces after us, be comforted knowing the Trumpkins haven’t seen anything yet!

Believe me – it’s a fantastic weapon!  It will show them NO mercy … not even a ladle bit!

That reminds me back when restaurants were open (and I had hearing), a waitress taking my order asked me “Soup or salad?”  I told her, “No, the regular salad will be just fine.”

I want to leave you with a couple of questions to mull over:

If you boil a couple of funny bones, does it then become a laughingstock?

(Oh, come on … You gotta agree that was humerus.)

Do you know what the difference between roast beef and pea soup is?

Anyone can roast beef.

Are you pointing to the Exit for me?  Remember, I’ll be here all week.  Try the fish, and be sure to tip your waitstaff.

 

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Aug 282020
 

I was certain the RNC Convention would prove to be a treasure trove for my “Friday Fun” post – but I wasn’t expecting THIS bumper crop!  With as much grist for mill as they sowed, it took me a lot longer to winnow the wheat from the chaff.  (Can you tell I miss my days on the family farm?)

I’d be derelict if I didn’t give top billing to Junior’s new main squeeze, Kimberly Guilfoyle.

It’s not often, but on a rare occasion I’m actually a bit relieved to have my hearing deficit – and apparently her speech SCREAMED on opening night is one of those.  The neighbor told me that he heard her entire screech – and his TV wasn’t even on!

Guilfoyle was certainly a champion Meme Generator – so let’s sample a few of the ones I enjoyed most.  To begin, here’s a compilation of folks reprising her shouted signature closing.

Having failed to keep up with the “cool kids” for decades now, I appreciated learning quite a bit about more recent culture trends than Howdy Doody, American Bandstand, or even Candid Camera.  So, for all you Power Ranger aficionados, she reminded lots of folks of Rita Repulsa.

Being more old-school, I’d go with Evita

Or even Cruella de Vil

But no matter which persona you see her as, I think we can all agree that this is amazingly accurate description of her performance:

Given that Junior’s contribution featured his rapid-fire delivery, bloodshot, watery, dilated eyes and sweaty skin, many people are saying he and Kimberly shared their Stash before appearing.  Having seen my share of cocaine complications among teens, I could not argue against that observation.

Based on Kim and Junior’s performances, it’s fair to conclude that Rethuglicans have lost their “War on Drugs”:

 

Seems to me that if SIX of the twelve “Keynote Speakers” share the same last name as Dear Leader, it’s fair to conclude the GOP is currently drifting into North Korea territory.

But there was good and understandable reason for that …

If you happen to be wondering why you never received your gold-embossed Summons … errr … Invitation to any of the events – that, too, can be easily explained:

Of course, there were other speakers, like the McCloskeys from St. Louis who had a unique qualification beside donating huge amounts of money …

And Donnie was heartbroken to learn that Jerry Falwell, Jr. turned down his invitation to speak at the convention.  But as we’ve recently learned from his pool boy, Giancarlo Granda

Despite their promises to the contrary, the RNC Convention exposé was a four-day forum of forlorn, dark, oppressive and depressing presentations.  Rod Serling provides the reason for that:

And Charlie Brown easily provides the closing take-home lesson from their four-day debacle:

No doubt we all agree it’d be great if we could just skip ahead to the time when we have a vaccine … and Trump is in prison!

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Aug 222020
 

Trump Gaffes Part 2 will focus on his verbal, pronunciation and spelling slipups, and I’ll start with the low-hanging fruit.

While it’s impossible to figure out the very first Trump gaffe, one of the earliest ones was just a couple of months into his administration – back in May of 2017.  As always, Trump just deletes anything he deems embarrassing – so there’s only a screenshot of his famous whine about negative press Covfefe:

But just because Trump deletes it doesn’t mean the Twittersphere is going to let it pass.

Once the Mueller Investigation began, I don’t think Trump let a day pass without whining about something.  One of his longer whines was when he claimed that Democrats were unable to find a Smocking Gun.

(No idea why, but he let this one remain.)

Fortunately the Twitterverse was able to locate the Smocking Gun:

(One thing we can all agree on is that Trump has never COLLUDED with a Spell Checker.)

After the Clemson football team was crowned national champions, Trump invited them to the White House.  But his self-induced government shutdown (because the funding bill didn’t include money for his Wall) meant the White House kitchen staff was gone – so he had to improvise.

But who knew that rather than standard fast food fare, he would elect to get Hamberders instead!

Burger King responded brilliantly:

A surprising fact I learned while putting this together is that Trump gaffes, when committed in an official capacity, are memorialized by the official White House records.

An example is when Trump saluted parents who sacrifice for the FURNITURE of their children.  It’s in the official White House transcript:

One that truly baffles me is that Trump has repeatedly, and on multiple occasions, claimed that the F-35 Stealth aircraft is LITERALLY INVISIBLE.

 I personally think he has a Wonder Woman fixation – and is thinking of her “Literally Invisible” plane:

 One of my favorites is during a July 4th celebration the Teleprompter stopped working, and Trump had to wing it.  If you had any doubt how the Revolutionary War was going to turn out, Trump reassured you that the tides changed in our favor when Gen. Washington was able to take over all the airports:

 

Our Army manned the air, it ran the ramparts, it took over the airports, it did everything it had to do.”

Here’s George commanding our “Revolutionary” Air Force:

And I guess George agreed with Tom Cruise even way back then that …

“I felt the need … the need for speed”

There are so many more Trump gaffes, I’m going to switch to compilation videos to help out.

We’ve all known that Trump – combining his 3rd grade reading level and difficulty using a Teleprompter – produces disastrous pronunciations.

 

Even when a person is standing right next to him, Trump can NOT remember anyone’s name.

And we’ll close with one from the Daily Show.  We’re all aware that Trump et al have been trying (with no success) to convince folks that Biden’s going senile.  With a clever job of splicing, the Daily Show was able to turn the tables and make Fox News extremely concerned about Trump’s mental acuity – using his own words!

I’ve left out quite a few – but I did try to select the ones that amused me the most.  But I think it’s time I move on to another topic next week.

Hopefully you feel better armed to counter any claims mocking Biden’s mental acuity.

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