SoINeedAName

Oct 012021
 

Like many of you, I miss the comments and insight that Mitch used to regularly provide here.  (And I remain flummoxed on why he can’t logon to our site anymore.)

I was fortunate to be on his email list where he frequently shares heartwarming stories, articles and photos.  I felt that it’d be nice if we could “keep in touch” with Mitch, even if only virtually and vicariously.  So today’s post is courtesy of Mitch.

A Heartwarming Piper’s Tale

As a bagpiper, I was asked by a local funeral director (with whom I’ve worked before) to play at a graveside service for a homeless man who died all alone, with no family or friends.  The funeral was to be held at a newly opened pauper’s cemetery in the remote countryside near where we live, and the homeless man would be the first person to be laid to rest there.

Sadly, I was not familiar with the backwoods area and became woefully lost.  Not only being male, but also being dressed in my kilt and sporran, I elected not to stop and ask for directions.  I continued to drive around until I finally found it … an hour later.

I saw the backhoe and the digging crew who were taking their lunchbreak, but the hearse and funeral director were nowhere in sight.  I figured they waited as long as possible and finally left.

Embarrassed at being so late and unsure of what exactly to do, I apologized to the workers for interrupting their lunch because of my tardiness, and stepped to the side of the open grave where I saw the vault lid was already in place.

I assured the workers I would not hold them up too long, but felt that I needed to fulfill my obligations.  The workers gathered around while I solemnly began playing my heart out.

As I continued to play the mournful dirges, I could hear the workers begin to quietly weep.  I played like I’d never played before, from Abide with Me, Going Home, Flowers of the Forest, and of course closing with Amazing Grace with the workers joining in song.

Upon finishing and packing up my bagpipe, I headed to my car feeling contrite that I was an hour late and missed the actual service itself.

As I was opening the car door and putting my gear in, one of the workers came up to thank me, saying in a heavy Irish brogue: “Sweet Mary and Joseph, I have never heard nothin’ like that before – and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for over twenty years!”

 

A Baker’s Dozen Clever Ads and Messages – Courtesy of Mitch

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Sep 262021
 

In the spring of 2020, Artist Susanne Brennan Firstenberg was incensed when Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick (R-TX) told Tucker Carlson, while discussing the raging COVID pandemic, that “There are more important things than living.”

Patrick even went further during that interview to suggest grandparents should be willing to die from COVID in order to save the economy for their grandchildren.

CREATOR: Suzanne Brennan Firstenberg

“That really disturbed me,” Firstenberg, who’s worked as a Hospice volunteer for over 25 years, told ABC News.  But it inspired her into action with creation of her first display of more than 267,000 small white flags on the four-acre D.C. Armory Parade Grounds in the fall of 2020, just outside RFK Stadium.

At that time, she had originally planned on displaying small American flags.  But not only did she decide she didn’t want to politicize her efforts– she couldn’t find enough small American flags because of the election.  Consequently, she was happy with her selection of white because it signifies innocence and purity.

Moved by the overwhelming response to her first installation, she knew that second one would require a much larger venue.  She began discussions with the Federal Parks Service, and was successful in securing a site on the National Mall of more than 20 acres next to the Washington Monument.  It borders the White House, the National Museum of African American History and Culture and the World War II Memorial.

The installation, In America: Remember, will be open for viewing from September 17 thru October 3, 2021.

She initially purchased 630,000 flags in June, but the Delta variant combined with the selfishness of anti-maskers and anti-vaxxers leading to more deaths forced her to purchase an additional 60,000.

[NOTE how the tote board number changes]

Firstenberg enlisted the services of Ruppert Landscape for 150 employees working with a corps of volunteers to place the flags in 143 geometric sections that create 3.8 miles of walking paths.  Scattered throughout the display are numerous white benches, making it easy for visitors’ quiet reflections.

This year’s installation is also designed to be more interactive.  They will have 10,000 Sharpies available for visitors to use to inscribe personal messages on the flags.

And for those unable to view it in person, they can request on the installation’s website to have a message commemorating their loved one(s) written on a flag and then planted for them. The flag will be photographed and its location recorded so mourners can find it on a digital map of the installation, created by Esri, a geographic information company.

They encourage people to decorate the flags as they deem appropriate.  There was a group of doctors and nurses from Maryland’s Howard County General Hospital who decorated the flags with red stickers to honor the more than 3,600 healthcare workers who have died of COVID.

During the opening ceremony dedication, Lonnie G. Bunch III, the secretary of the Smithsonian Institution, noted that the flag display is the largest installation on the Mall since the that of the AIDS Memorial Quilt, another collaborative art piece that was displayed multiple times during the height of the AIDS epidemic.

[Demonstrates how the flags are symmetrically planted.  And that’s Speaker Pelosi visiting the site.]

Firstenberg, compelled by outrage she felt for Trump and his fellow Republicans constantly downplaying the pandemic during the election, was  inspired to create her first installation.  She now hopes the second installation will convince people to get vaccinated.

“The last thing I want to do is to have to buy more flags.”

 

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Sep 192021
 

You probably have noticed that I’ve become more and more incensed with the willful stupidity of people who have refused being vaccinated against COVID.  This is compounded by the media incessantly telling us we should handle the anti-vaxxers and anti-maskers with ” kid gloves” and not shame them or make them feel guilty WRT their perpetuating the pandemic.

If this were not literally a matter of life and death, I might acquiesce.  But since it is, I won’t.

With that in mind, I’m going to do something I’ve not done before: use another person’s post, because I think it addresses the issue far better than I ever could.  It’s a letter by a nurse to her patient.

In general, I am NOT a fan of the Reddit website (for obvious reasons).  But they have niche sub-Reddits that can be interesting.  The one I’m referencing the “Herman Cain (Posthumous) Award”:

https://www.reddit.com/r/HermanCainAward/

It’s composed of Tweets and other postings generally mocking anti-vaxxers and anti-maskers.  It inspired another website that chronicles those who had posted anti-vaccine messages who are either hospitalized or have died from COVID:

https://www.sorryantivaxxer.com/

Not exactly my cup of tea, so I rely on others to do the vetting of these sites.  Occasionally there’s a very serious post that is worthy of sharing – and this is one:

https://www.reddit.com/r/HermanCainAward/comments/pqm303/an_open_letter_to_my_patient/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

She refers to it as her “TED Talk” – a pretty apt description.  But you’ll note that it’s written as a stream of conscious, which makes it a bit difficult to follow.  So a fellow Kossack reformatted it in an easier-to-read manner:

https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2021/9/18/2053011/-A-Letter-To-Her-Patient-by-an-ICU-nurse

 

WARNING: It might have discussions that could be Triggers for some, so proceed cautiously.  It’s long and understandably contains a number spelling and grammar errors.  I didn’t feel they should be corrected.  And as Daily Kos was fine publishing it in toto, I see no reason not to either.

 

An Open Letter To My Patient.

I’m sitting here in my car this morning, too exhausted to even start driving. I can’t get your face out of my head. These community hospital shifts are brutal.

I remember taking care of you 4 weeks ago.  You had gone to urgent care the beginning of august. Just barely in your 50’s. A few years older than me. No medical or surgical history. No vaccine. Diagnosed with Covid, sent home with meds. 2 days later EMS brought you in, hypoxic, in horrible condition. We quickly intubated you. You looked so bad. You suffered through proning. Acute kidney injury. Dialysis.

4 weeks ago we were hopeful. You were going for a peg and trach. We couldn’t get you off sedation or you would panic and decompensate. I don’t remember now what problem you were having that was making it so hard to get the trach done, I just remember it kept getting cancelled.

Fast forward 5 weeks later. I’m back at this hospital after my own bout of Covid. I’m back to work already. But I was vaccinated. you are my patient again. You are not doing well. They thought after the trach you would do better. You did for a couple of days. Then the first lung collapsed needing a chest tube. Then the second. Then more pneumonia. More dialysis.

You are a DNR now. Your wife is exhausted. We were supposed to make you comfort care tomorrow. You have 3 daughters. The youngest is just 14. We are waiting for her to come in.

You can’t wait for tomorrow. I get report to find out you tanked. They pushed atropine at 6pm to get your heart rate up, went up on the pressors.

Your wife has been told, she had just finally gotten to the laundry mat and put the clothes in. We tell her you won’t make the night. She’s hurrying as fast as she can.

I go in to see you. You are a shell. You don’t respond to anything anymore. You lay there, pale and gray, mouth hanging open. I wave a fly away from out of your mouth, it can’t seem to wait for you to pass.

Your wife and kids come in. They are barely holding it together. My eyes go to your youngest. She looks terrified and lost. I can’t imagine what this is like for her. I just want to hug her. I try to smile with my eyes from behind the mask, doing everything I can to give comfort.

In an ideal world you would be my only patient- but we have only half the nurses we should. We are all running.  Transferring patients to get more in. I have to go see my other unvaccinated Intubated Covid patient, also your age.

I squeeze your wife’s arm supportively and hurry to put on all my gear. You seem “stable” so I hurry to do what I need in my other room. Im not in there 5 minutes and your heart rate and blood pressure drop again.

The doctor sticks her head in to let me know. There’s nobody to go attend you, we are all drowning.

I hurry.

I come out and the doc asks me if we are waiting for any other family members to arrive- judging if we will make you “comfort” or keep trying to keep you alive.

I try to find a way to gently bring this up with your wife. She says at first no, nobody else is coming. Yes comfort measures are good. No more interventions.

You are air hungry, breathing too fast and alarming your vent. Doc gives me pain med orders to keep you comfortable, I go up on sedation and push meds.

Your 14 year old is holding your hand. She can’t watch me do it, she is terrified of needles and afraid I’m poking you. I show her I’m not, it’s just a syringe in your IV. Tears are in her eyes and she just can’t watch.

Doc tells me to turn of your pressors.

Your wife comes out and says wait- let me call his mom. Your mom was planning on coming tomorrow morning. I go up on your pressors and we wait for her.

This tiny frail woman comes in. She worries me. I’m a mom myself. I can’t imagine seeing my child like this, let alone watching him die.

I give everyone some time, then when they are ready I turn off the blood pressure meds. Your heart rate is already in the 40’s.

It doesn’t take very long, about an hour. Your heart rate gets slower and slower as your oxygen level reads less and less, until there is no more blood pressure reading or oxygen. I watch your rhythm change, I know it will be moments. I want to be in there with you and your family, but we don’t have enough staff. I sit on the monitor so I can keep silencing the maddening alarms.

Your family watches as you flatline.

A wail goes up that pierces my soul. It’s your girls. Your wife is trying to be strong for them.

I keep silencing the alarm, trying to find help to get the monitor turned off. I print your last EKG strip showing asystole. I call the doctor as I frantically mash buttons. Finally I get some help to turn it off once the doctor has come to pronounce you and take you off the ventilator.

Time of death, 3 hours into my shift.

Even flatlined and off the vent, you give one little sigh and belly rise after the doctor pronounces. I pray your kids didn’t see it, I don’t want them any more traumatized.

Your family stays a while.

I make my mandated call to the organ and tissue donor line. We go through the rote questions, even though we both know Covid will keep you from being a donor.

The lady on the other end asks me the cause of death. I give a dark laugh, Covid of course. I ask her is there any other kind right now? She sighs and says no.

I hang up and check on your family. I go through all my tough questions and paperwork.  Do you have a funeral home picked out? No? That’s ok you can call us with that information.

They ask what happens next. I tell them to take whatever time they need. Your wife asks me if we need the room.

I lie and tell her no. Where will you go, they ask. I let them know you will be transported to the morgue, pending funeral home pick up.

Your daughter gives a hitching sob.

I ask if there are any belongings. Your mom wants your ring. Your wife has your regular wedding ring at home. It’s just silicone on your finger now, but I give it to your mom. The only thing else here is the shorts you came in the ambulance wearing. Your wife doesn’t want them, she can’t bear to look at it. She tells me to just throw them away.

Your family is ready to go. They mill about outside your room, all but your oldest. She can’t bear to leave you. She sits by your bed, crying. Your youngest is shriveled in on herself, holding her stomach like somehow she can contain her grief that way.

I give my condolences to your family; it sounds hollow even to myself. What can I say? I tell your wife that your daughter can stay as long as she needs, they can go on home if they want.

This is where your wife loses it, her voice breaking and tears spilling out. “I don’t want her driving by herself. I need to know she’s ok and not alone”. I nod in understanding. I have a kid her age.

I have to go check on my other patient, I hear IV’s beeping and alarms going off. They never stop.

When I come back out, you are all that’s left in the room. I do your post mortem care. All of the lines and tubes and invasive things have to come out. I remove your chest tubes, your dialysis catheter, your central line, your internal fecal bag. Your trach we worked so hard to put in.

I try my best to clean up all the foul fluids and place bandages on you so you stop leaking so badly. I wash you and attach the tag to your toe. I get help and zip you into the body bag, naked but for that toe tag. Security comes and you finally leave this ICU, after entering it 7 weeks ago.

Housekeeping comes and does a stat clean- there are more patients waiting for your bed. Another nurse tells me your wife is so upset because one of your daughters has still been refusing the vaccine.

She says how can you risk putting me through this again? I wonder if it’s the one who couldn’t leave. I hope for her & your wife’s sake this changes her mind. I sigh, try to shake it off and go admit the next patient who can’t breathe.

EPILOGUE

TL:DR- all of this is a real account. None of it is exaggerated or made up. If anything I held back, for fear of revealing too much patient information. This doesn’t even talk about what it’s like when all these patients keep coming, all having the same outcomes.

My next admit from the floor is 74- both him and his wife caught Covid. His admit note says he was vaccinated but the doctor tells me no- they asked their kids and their kids told them not to get it.

He’s dying and all I can notice is the sassy earring he sports. He is confused and won’t keep his bipap on, rips it off and fights and screams for me to help him.

For all of you lurking who are vaccine hesitant or anti-vax- please read this. Think about your kids, your family. Think about their grief and exhaustion.

My patient was fit, healthy, working. He was a skeleton in that body bag.

For those of you posting in here, I’m glad for the support you give us, and for the positive reinforcement you give those that decide to get vaccinated.

I also hope this gives you some insight as to why it’s not so easy to just say “too bad so sad you didn’t get vaccinated”.

I don’t know if my patient was anti-vax, ignorant, or thought he wouldn’t be affected. I don’t actually care. What I care about is that poor 14 year old girl who will be traumatized for the rest of her life. Please get vaccinated. This is all so unnecessary.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

 

 

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Sep 112021
 

PREFACE

Let me begin by saying I tried as best I could to avoid any photo that might be an overt trigger for some.  Therefore, there are no photos of falling towers, no jumpers, no explosions, etc.

The biggest obstacles were deciding what pictures to include and how to arrange them.  (The arranging aspect took a great deal longer than anticipated.)  I have attributions for all photos that had attributions – but quite a few of them did not.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t find a way to create GIFs that included attribution text.

A number of the photos are so unique that they defied grouping them, so I pulled them out and will scatter them throughout the post with some additional background on them.

I was fortunate to have visited the Observation Deck of the original WTC.  And later, with the new World Trade Center its twin Waterfall Pools that sit in the footprints of the North and South Towers of the original WTC.  (Sadly, the Museum was not completed at the time of my last NYC visit.)

So let’s begin our journey on a day that changed the world …

Chief of Staff Andy Card informs Pres. Bush that “America is under attack.”

Attrib.: Paul J. Richards

Vigils to honor those lost in the WTC Towers, first responders and their families began the evening of 9/11, and have continued around the world to this very day.

Memorials came in all manner of types, forms and locations, from NYC to all points north, south, east and west.

Virtually any vertical surface in Manhattan was soon covered with plaintive pleas from family and friends bearing photos and details about the Missing.

This is Marcy Borders, a 28 y/o legal assistant who worked in the North Tower.  She evacuated the Tower but was directed into the lobby of a nearby office building by a policeman to avoid the dust storm caused by the collapse of the South Tower.

(Just a refresher: While the North Tower [WTC 1] was struck first, the South Tower [WTC 2] fell first.)

Stan Honda is the photographer, and he visited Ms. Borders a year later.  But sadly she died of stomach cancer in 2015.

These are blood-stained shoes worn by Linda Lopez as she evacuated from the 97th floor of the South Tower.  When the first plane struck the North Tower, Lopez said the fireball from it felt like she was being burned.

Confusion was rampant, but she decided to evacuate.  She had only reached the 61st when she was thrown against a wall as the second plane crashed into the South Tower dozens of floors above her.

She took off her shoes to increase her departure speed and ran across broken glass.  After making it safely out, a few blocks away a stranger told her: “Lady – your feet are bleeding!”  She put her shoes back on, and they are now on display in the WTC Museum.

Attrib.: Lucas Jackson

 It was a time our nation stood united, and displays of patriotism were common, sincerely felt and carried no hidden agendas.  Flags were on display everywhere.

Of course, all means of public transportation were halted.

Attrib.: Ken Ruinard

And New Yorkers started the long trek to make it to home, family, friends or hotels – including walking across the Brooklyn Bridge.

Attrib.: Daniel Shanken

While Manhattan obviously was the epicenter of 9/11, it was not the only location the Saudis (NOT the Iraqis) had selected to attack.  And there are memorials at those locations also.

PENTAGON

SHANKSVILLE, PA: “Are you ready?  OK.  Let’s roll! “

The rural Pennsylvania hillside features both a wall and a carillon of wind chimes – “The Tower of Voices”

Obviously New Jersey was spared the physical assault, but being directly across the Hudson River from Manhattan, it bears scars also.

They built an attractive memorial called “Empty Sky” …

Attrib.: Zawhaus Photography

The walls creates a unique arc when reflecting the sunlight …

Attrib.: R. London

No doubt we all hope that in the not-too-distant future America will once again be able to re-capture that 9/11 spirit of Unity that emerged from a tragedy.

But it will take a towering light to lead us.

(Note: The man videoing the “Tribute of Light” with his tablet is Paul Marantz – the lighting consultant for the project.)

 

We can all hope that such a leader will once again emerge soon …

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Heads-Up Update …

 Posted by at 8:44 am  Politics
Sep 092021
 

I had all along planned on posting a simple, brief commemoration for 9/11 on 9/11.

So there will be no “Friday Fun” (and I doubt I’d call it a “Saturday Smile” either.)

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Sep 042021
 

This Monday, Labor Day, will mark the unofficial close of summer 2021.  One of my fondest childhood summer memories is being entranced by the annual low-key lightshow in June and July courtesy of fireflies.  And of course, catching them in my Mom’s Ball Mason jars.

But sadly, with pollution and conversion of rural land to subdivisions, that delightful experience is becoming harder and harder to come by for kids today.  So I thought it’d be fun to revisit those sweet childhood memories before Fall sets in, in a final farewell to Summer.

While there still are areas blessed with fireflies here, Japan is the Mecca for those who truly want to enjoy spectacular firefly shows.

First, a little background: Fireflies are a type beetle with more than 2,000 species.  The males use their flashing light while flying to attract females who are usually resting in the grass.  When she sees a flashing pattern she particularly fancies, she’ll flash back to signal she’s interested in mating.

While the adult firefly only lives about two months, typically in June and July (give or take a few weeks), that still gives them plenty of time to produce eggs that will hatch into larvae and then emerge from their pupae next summer to put on a new lightshow.

In Japan, fireflies are called Hotaru.  While Japan has about 45 different species, only 14 of them have the flashing capability.

In the Heian era (794 – 1185) noblemen and women would take excursions into the countryside just to enjoy the firefly lightshows, as it was the epitome of summer enjoyment.

Fireflies in Japan are seen as symbols of both love and war, and celebrated in song and writings.  In fact, in The Tale of Genji (which some view as the world’s first novel) the hero provides his brother a brief glimpse of a beautiful damsel by releasing a bag of fireflies in her boudoir.  Yet others think that their ethereal lights are the altered remnants of the souls of soldiers killed in battle.

In a myriad of ways fireflies play a prominent role in Japanese culture – like in the song “Hotaru no Hikari” (Light of the Firefly).  It’s one of the most popular songs in Japan, traditionally sung when parting ways or marking the end of the year.  So it’s no surprise it’s sung to the tune of the Scottish song “Auld Lang Syne” (which doesn’t mention a single firefly).

It’s also worked its way into the language, such as “Keisetsu-jidadi” which literally means “the era of the firefly and snow”.  It refers to one’s days as student, back when children would study by the light provided by fireflies or at the window in the winter with light reflected off the snow.

A very recent addition to their lexicon is “hotaru-zoku” (firefly tribe).  There are many high-rise apartments in Japan, and men are typically forced to smoke outside on their balconies.  So the glow from the cigarettes mimics the glow of the firefly, which can’t survive in urban spaces.

Today, Japanese families takes trips to dozens of rural locations that are designated as firefly reserves.  These spots provide the three essentials for fireflies to live: [1] Clean, unpolluted water (that’s where the larvae live); [2] Grassy banks and trees along the waterways (where they can rest); and [3] Darkness (so they can see each other in order to select a mate).

Some of the best-known firefly photos were taken by Daniel Kordan, a Russian landscape photographers.  An assignment in Japan happened to coincide with the peak time for firefly viewing – and he was hooked.  “I felt like a kid looking for the first time in my life at a Christmas tree!”

Let’s enjoy some of his work.

One of the most unique and rare attributes of fireflies are males that actually synchronize their flashes.  They’re found in a very limited number of sites: the Great Smoky Mountains, the mangrove forests in Southeast Asia that light up the whole tree, and the island of Okinawa.

Not surprisingly, the synchronous lightshow of the Photinus carolinus firefly is so mesmerizing that it draws over 12,000 visitors every year to the Great Smoky Mountains National Park in Elkmont, TN.

For those that want to learn more on how the males synchronize their flashes, here are two links:

https://www.ecowatch.com/firefly-synchronization-2653841078.html

https://www.ecowatch.com/synchronous-fireflies-great-smoky-mountains-2653387318.html

But if we don’t understand all the details on how and why, we can still enjoy their show:

And so we bid a fond farewell to our childhood days of summer …

(I always wanted to use that phrase.)

 

 

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Sep 032021
 

But you’d be wrong!

What I thought was going to be an easy, straightforward “Farewell to Summer” Friday Fun turned out to be more interesting and complex than I had thought.

So once again, I tried to bite off more than I can chew …

Plus today is “Phone Call Day” from my nephew and his family (I actually have to SCHEDULE my phone calls with them so they’ll all be available).

So, once again Friday Fun will morph to a Saturday Smile.

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Aug 282021
 

When Trump announced his run for president in 2015, he (in)famously boasted:

“I will build a great wall—and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me—and I’ll build them very inexpensively.  I will build a great, great wall on our southern border, and I will make Mexico pay for that wall.  Mark my words.”

https://time.com/5499391/donald-trump-border-wall-mexico-pay/

 

RIIIGGGHHHTTT …

Sadly, the courts had allowed Trump to ignore environmental laws during the wall’s construction, and that mistake proved to be its undoing.  As the old Chiffon margarine ad goes: “It’s not nice to fool Mother Nature.”

Trump’s US-Mexico border wall was no match for the heavy rains and accompanying flooding that happened this past week in Southern Arizona.  They destroyed a large section of TFG’s wall along the San Bernardino National Wildlife Refuge.

Rain measurements near Douglas, AZ (closest town to the wall) showed 290 cubic-feet of water moving through the area every second – that’s equivalent to 112,200 gallons of water every minute.  And it was calculated the storm surge could have reached a height of 25 feet!

Flood gates are common across sections of the wall along the Arizona-Mexico border. Agents must manually raise the gates to protect the steel barriers from thousands of gallons of floodwater laden with sediment, rocks, and tree limbs that can otherwise pile up to create a dam, with the power of the water overwhelming and toppling parts of the border wall.

http://www.tucsonsentinel.com/local/report/082121_border_wall_damaged/monsoon-floods-damage-border-wall-near-douglas/

Gizmodo blamed the failure on rushed construction and an alleged bypassing of environmental regulations“Who could have predicted this?  Ah yes, just about everyone,” author Brian Kahn penned in the article.

https://gizmodo.com/trumps-border-wall-torn-apart-by-arizona-monsoon-rains-1847535174

[Not sure why, but this video showing the results of the flooding cannot be embedded.  You have to click on it to view it.]

https://youtu.be/rvPVYHeVaYc

I want to close on an upbeat note.  While things have not gone as well with our exit from Afghanistan as we would have hoped, there were some bright notes.

America’s men and women in uniform have, once again, covered themselves in glory with displays of care and compassion – particularly with Afghani children.

I could not find attributions for these – but I want to include them anyway:

Of course it wasn’t only with children that they displayed their compassion.  And I’m sure you join me in thanking them for their service – they did us proud!

 

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