May 072021
Hopefully I’ll be able to post something over the weekend. But I HAVE to get my taxes done, because I’m heading back up to Illinois on Monday for filing.
My dear aunt’s illness and death has set me back a bit – but the funeral was lovely and it was great to see family and her church friends.
(She’s buried at the Arsenal, and until my uncle passed [WWII vet] I had NO idea that military cemeteries bury the 2nd deceased spouse on top of the first. I found that a bit disconcerting.)
7 Responses to “The Taxman Cometh …”
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I learned that when I buried my mom. In her case, what went on top was cremains. But to me it made sense. I didn’t really analyze it then, but if you set aside a separate plot, and then the spouse remarries and decides (or the new spouse decides) they should be buried elsewhere, you have aplot that can’t be used. Many military cemeteries are completely full – The one in Santa Fe, for instance, can accept cremains now and I assume spouses, but no new burials. My husband’s father died when he was 2, and was buried in a joint plot with space for his mother. She remarried, and wanted to be buried elsewhere, so got a joint polt for her and hubby’s stepfather (who almost immediately remarried.) I don’t know what happened with that plot, but they gave the one next to Hubby’s father to him. He actually tried selling it, through the biggest funeral home there – absolutely no takers. Eventually he decided to deed it to a friend, an immigrant with no family here. Many people are really weird about how they want their dead bodies treated.
It was actually when I first learned about two bodies in one plot that I found it disconcerting. It appeals to my practicality and makes sense. They no longer hold graveside services (too far and difficult to get to it), but they built a charming little pavilion right next to a road where they hold the service.
Even in cemeteries that are “full’, I suspect there’s space to build a columbarium for cremains. You can stack a lot of urns in very little space.
Exactly.
Another “solution” is to use space to plant small shrubs/roses, with a name tag/stone, and collect the urns in a columbarium (together, rather than in box spaces) – My grandparents’ cremains are in such a place in Oxford (UK) – and it is a place of beauty & peace.
Of course this has you discombobulated, dear friend.
You reminded me to file for an extension. When I did taxes last time, I expected to be 100% dead today, so there was no issue.
As for my remains, I shall share the ashes among those I love.
That – is very sweet.
But we are all glad you are still with us.
Mom’s cremains joined Dad’s at Golden Gate. We were told they only did services for the vet themselves and not the spouse, but were able to arrange for a VFW chaplain to do a brief graveside service. I understood their plan for both to be there was because it was a Veteran’s benefit and had no cost to them like doing anything else. In the years between the two deaths, Northern CA got two more VA cemeteries. My aunt inquired at the one for Spokane, WA when my cousin was buried there about arranging for siblings to be nearby (two of the three are also vets), but spacial arrangements not allowed for siblings.