As September is drawing to a close, we can all agree that this has been a terrible month for Twitler – which makes it a pretty damn good month for us.
So let’s review some of Twitler’s lowlights and our highlights.
Let’s start back on Thursday, September 6th in the unlikely place of Billings, MT at one of Twitler’s tiresome ego-boosting rallies. It was there we learned that not all hero’s wear capes – some of them wear plaid!
That backdrop gallery Twitler demands to cheer him on, despite being hand-picked by his handlers for their “enthusiasm”, contained a “one-of-these-is-not-like-the-others” person. Our unlikely hero was a 17 year-old senior from Billings West High School, Tyler Linfesty – who became better known as #PlaidShirtGuy.
Had to share again just because. ? #PlaidShirtGuy pic.twitter.com/sbGrzluJbz
— Ricky Davila (@TheRickyDavila) September 9, 2018
And oddly enough, he was just a couple folks away from a Nose-Picking Trumpkin who decided the American flag she was wearing was just the perfect hankie to wipe her nose.
You might think wiping your nose on the flag is patriotic but it’snot
— The Hoarse Whisperer (@HoarseWisperer) September 8, 2018
After a while, Twitler’s crack-crew realized Linfesty was making an even bigger fool of Twitler than he does by himself – and so kicked him out. But only after having the Secret Service detain him and run a check on him simply because he was not adoring enough of “Dear Leader”.
It’s like they don’t even realize our First Amendment exists – and just start with the 2nd.
Here’s a sampling of #PlaidShirtGuy’s great facial expressions, Trumpkin’s nose-picking gal and our hero’s unfortunate forced-exit. But luckily #PlaidShirtGuy ruled the internets for days!
Even before #PlaidShirtGuy, Trump was already reeling from the Anonymous Op-Ed “I Am Part of the Resistance Inside the Trump Administration” published in his “favorite” paper, “The New York Times”.
Naturally Twitler went ballistic:
And the sad thing is the list of people “ratting” him out is virtually endless …
Although leaked much earlier, Twitler was hit by another body-blow with the official publication of Bob Woodward’s devastating book, “FEAR: Trump in the White House” on September 11th.
And while the book is chockablock full of scathing details that we’re all familiar with by now, the truly sad thing is that the gestalt – the tenor – of the book does not surprise us one whit. We already knew Twitler was an amoral, lying, ruthless, misogynist a$$hole before he even announced his candidacy.
But for the sake of posterity, here are two good sources for a few takeaway highlights (or lowlights, depending on perspective) of Twitler’s deeply-flawed “Crazytown”:
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/09/04/us/politics/trump-woodward-book-fear.html
https://talkingpointsmemo.com/news/five-most-shocking-episodes-from-woodward-white-house-memoir
Stormy Daniels did not want to be left out of the bashing fun, so she too revealed a little of her upcoming book:
“He knows he has an unusual penis,” Daniels writes. “It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool …
“I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart …
“It may have been the least impressive sex I’d ever had, but clearly, he didn’t share that opinion.”
I suspect my reaction was very similar to yours …
And of course, we’re all …
Waiting for Trump to have a letter from 65 women saying his penis doesn’t look like the mushroom from Mario Kart.
— Tony Posnanski (@tonyposnanski) September 18, 2018
And it looks like this Thursday has the potential to become the cherry on top of a great September when Dr. Christine Blasey Ford appears before the Judiciary Committee with its 11 old, white, male Rethuglicans.
While I’m not holding my breath it’ll stop him, Kavanaugh, for his part, has been furiously prepping for his upcoming grilling (and a brand-new opportunity to lie & perjure himself some more). But leaks show it’s not been going well for Brett at all:
But Kavanaugh grew frustrated when it came to questions that dug into his private life, particularly his drinking habits and his sexual proclivities, according to three people familiar with the preparations, who requested anonymity to discuss internal deliberations. He declined to answer some questions altogether, saying they were too personal, these people said.
“I’m not going to answer that,” Kavanaugh said at one point….
Too personal? TOO PERSONAL?!?
This from the guy who, in a Memo 20 years ago, directed his boss, Ken Starr, to ask Pres. Clinton during the impeachment procedures the following questions:
WARNING: NSFW – POSSIBLE TRIGGER
If Monica Lewinsky says you inserted a cigar into her vagina while you were in the Oval Office area, would she be lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that you had phone sex with her on approximately 15 occasions, would she be lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that on several occasions in the Oval Office area, you used your fingers to stimulate her vagina and bring her to orgasm, would she be lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that she gave you oral sex on nine occasions in the Oval Office area, would she by lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that you ejaculated into her mouth on two occasions in the Oval Office area, would she be lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that on several occasions you had her give oral sex, made her stop, and then ejaculated into the sink in the bathroom off the Oval Office, would she be lying?
If Monica Lewinsky says that you masturbated into a trashcan in your secretary’s office, would she be lying?
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/20/us/politics/brett-kavanaugh-clinton-starr.html
No wonder the a$$hole looks scared to death …
Yep, all-in-all September has been a very good month. And it’s not over with yet!
4 Responses to “Sunday Smile: September Has Been a Good Month!”
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Cross posted to Care2 HERE.
“It’s like they don’t even realize our First Amendment exists – and just start with the 2nd.” that’s right. And they also stop with the Second.
I LOVE Jess Dweck! I worked for a brain dead asshole once, in the military, and one guy snapped and wrote an anonymous letter to the Commanding General (he phrased it as being about “an asshole that” discharges “at both ends”). It took three days to identify him. And that commanding officer wasn’t even close to Orange Judas.
I think it was George Takei who pointed out that she didn’t specify WHICH mushroom character, and in fact there is one of each gender. It’s the turban that gives them the mushroom look. I can’y help thinking … Traitor Tots a white supremacist … and white supremacists do NOT lie people from religions which involve circumcision … just sayin’
As I type this, there are now THREE accusers, and one is represented by Avenatti.
Every day brings something new, doesn’t it!
LOL!!
If Monica Lewinsky says that on several occasions you had her give oral sex, made her stop, and then ejaculated into the sink in the bathroom off the Oval Office, would she be lying?
If it were with Trump, she would be lying. Before he could even ask her to stop, it would be over.
This post with September’s bad news for Drumpf really made my day, Nameless. I’m keeping my fingers crossed you can turn into a monthly blog with increasingly worse news, culminating in the month Twitler is thrown out of office and then indicted for some major crimes.